Restlessly Still
Friday, March 30, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Happy Valentine's day!
I agree that there shouldn't be one day to celebrate the love you have if you are a couple. If you are single and want to call it single awareness day then by all means go ahead! But what ticks me off a bit is where people who are single throw either a pity party because they feel they need to have someone to just celebrate a commercial holiday. But what I don't like is that when single people are picking on couples because they love each other. I agree that you should love your partner every day and not just once a year, but that isn't okay to make couples feel bad because you are alone.
One post that made me wrote this said this: "Thank you to all the lovely couples out there reminding me today that I don't have a special someone in my life...happy single awareness day!" I'm sorry that ever couple has to stop being a couple because you are to busy focusing on why you don't have a boyfriend or girlfriend to do stuff with. They are the same that if they see two people showing a little PDA that they make quotes like "Get a room!" and they say it with disgust. If it bugs you so much then don't look!
I know they're couples out there that go a little far with a PDA and that isn't okay! And for the single people who don't make a big deal about it, I say thank you! You aren't being big cry babies about it. Like I've told people before; It is nice to have someone, but it isn't the end of the world if you don't have anyone!
And to those who make a big deal on not having a special someone, or bagging on couples because you are jealous I have one thing to say and ask of you:
1) Please stop teasing and making fun of couples! Just because you are jealous of others doesn't make it okay to be a jerk about it!
2) My Advise for those who are so desperate to find someone: Stop acting like you are God's gift to everyone. Stop the pity me game. It is a big turn off and it makes everyone not want to be around you (either relationships or friendship).
Thank you!
One post that made me wrote this said this: "Thank you to all the lovely couples out there reminding me today that I don't have a special someone in my life...happy single awareness day!" I'm sorry that ever couple has to stop being a couple because you are to busy focusing on why you don't have a boyfriend or girlfriend to do stuff with. They are the same that if they see two people showing a little PDA that they make quotes like "Get a room!" and they say it with disgust. If it bugs you so much then don't look!
I know they're couples out there that go a little far with a PDA and that isn't okay! And for the single people who don't make a big deal about it, I say thank you! You aren't being big cry babies about it. Like I've told people before; It is nice to have someone, but it isn't the end of the world if you don't have anyone!
And to those who make a big deal on not having a special someone, or bagging on couples because you are jealous I have one thing to say and ask of you:
1) Please stop teasing and making fun of couples! Just because you are jealous of others doesn't make it okay to be a jerk about it!
2) My Advise for those who are so desperate to find someone: Stop acting like you are God's gift to everyone. Stop the pity me game. It is a big turn off and it makes everyone not want to be around you (either relationships or friendship).
Thank you!
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Brain Vs. Heart
Lately I've been feeling out of sorts and I don't know why. I love my boyfriend very, very much, but I still feel unhappy. When we hang out, I'm happy and I have fun with him, but when we are apart...I feel like crying. I'm not sure why...is it because I'm not happy with him, or is it that I'm not happy without him...I don't know.
Before I wasn't happy with him because I thought he was lying to me. I thought he was cheating on me with this one girl. He almost cheated on me with another girl his first year up at Humboldt. After that I didn't believe that he loved me...I didn't trust him...He says he loves me, but I feel like that he I'm his ticket out.
I don't know what to do, who to believe...Part of me feels that I'm not for him that he needs better. Some of the things he jokes with me...I feel like he doesn't want to be with me like he is finding away out of the relationship. Part of me feels like breaking up with him is the right thing to do...but part of me loves him and wants to be with him.
The part of me that wants to be with him can see myself marrying him, having kids with him. He makes me laugh. He tells me that he loves me and that he means it. He tells me that I'm beautiful and he does try to make me feel good about myself. He said that he would treat me like a queen and that he can see a future with me. We have so much in common and we do have a good time together.
But the part of me that feels like breaking up is the best thing to do because no matter what happens now and what he says...I'm still hurt from the night of him almost cheating on me. And the words he said about him being with other girls if he wasn't with me. I feel that he isn't serious with me and I still feel hurt and pain with some of the memories. And despite that he hasn't cheated on me...he did lied to me. He told me he never talk to the girl that I felt like he was cheated on me and then tells me that here and there he does talk to her. I'm never sure with him.
He changed so much that I don't even know who he is anymore. The way he talks and acts isn't him anymore. It seems he tries to be someone that he isn't. The person he is trying to be is kind of a playboy and tries to get with whatever girl he can. I feel that he is going to be like that...if he hasn't been like that already. That he doesn't need me anymore and want to be with every girl that he kind of likes, or likes him. Soon I feel he will start to see that I'm not enough, or good enough for him.
I don't know how to feel anymore, what to do...
Before I wasn't happy with him because I thought he was lying to me. I thought he was cheating on me with this one girl. He almost cheated on me with another girl his first year up at Humboldt. After that I didn't believe that he loved me...I didn't trust him...He says he loves me, but I feel like that he I'm his ticket out.
I don't know what to do, who to believe...Part of me feels that I'm not for him that he needs better. Some of the things he jokes with me...I feel like he doesn't want to be with me like he is finding away out of the relationship. Part of me feels like breaking up with him is the right thing to do...but part of me loves him and wants to be with him.
The part of me that wants to be with him can see myself marrying him, having kids with him. He makes me laugh. He tells me that he loves me and that he means it. He tells me that I'm beautiful and he does try to make me feel good about myself. He said that he would treat me like a queen and that he can see a future with me. We have so much in common and we do have a good time together.
But the part of me that feels like breaking up is the best thing to do because no matter what happens now and what he says...I'm still hurt from the night of him almost cheating on me. And the words he said about him being with other girls if he wasn't with me. I feel that he isn't serious with me and I still feel hurt and pain with some of the memories. And despite that he hasn't cheated on me...he did lied to me. He told me he never talk to the girl that I felt like he was cheated on me and then tells me that here and there he does talk to her. I'm never sure with him.
He changed so much that I don't even know who he is anymore. The way he talks and acts isn't him anymore. It seems he tries to be someone that he isn't. The person he is trying to be is kind of a playboy and tries to get with whatever girl he can. I feel that he is going to be like that...if he hasn't been like that already. That he doesn't need me anymore and want to be with every girl that he kind of likes, or likes him. Soon I feel he will start to see that I'm not enough, or good enough for him.
I don't know how to feel anymore, what to do...
Monday, January 23, 2012
Relationship Status
I saw someone post a picture that states "Single is not a status. It's a word that best describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others." I'm not going to lie that it made me offended. I'm in a relationship with a wonderful person and I'm very happy with him! I'm not saying everyone needs to find someone and get in a relationship now, but I feel like it is saying that I need my boyfriend to be happy and enjoy life. Not everyone wants to be in a relationship, or ready to be in one.
Those who are single aren't losers...they just haven't found the right person for them, or that they are not the types that want to have a relationship. But they aren't better people than the ones that are in a relationship because they can live life without "depending" on others. Plus that isn't true...what about friends and family? I think people tend to rely on them as well as a lover if they had one. Relationships aren't for everyone...and they are people who are in a relationship that shouldn't really be in one for their own good.
Those who are in a relationships aren't better than those who aren't in one. Not everyone that is in a relationship isn't some weak person that can't be happy without having a boyfriend/girlfriend. Yes, I will agree that they are people out there that are in relationships, or want one because they aren't happy with who they are. Like I said before, I have a boyfriend that I'm very happy with...but it isn't the end all be all. I know that I will be okay without having him next to me 24/7. And if we did break up...I know that I will be okay and that life goes on. Relationships are great, but they aren't everything. If you can't take care of yourself then how do you expect to take care of another person.
I know a couple that is getting married, but they shouldn't because one the guy is trying to prove something and he is only getting what he thinks is the best he can do, and she is marrying him because she doesn't want die alone and she is cheating on him with many guys.
I guess what I'm saying is that relationships aren't everything and that you need to be happy with yourself. But I disagree with the quote because it sounds like everyone that is in a relationship needs people to be happy.
Those who are single aren't losers...they just haven't found the right person for them, or that they are not the types that want to have a relationship. But they aren't better people than the ones that are in a relationship because they can live life without "depending" on others. Plus that isn't true...what about friends and family? I think people tend to rely on them as well as a lover if they had one. Relationships aren't for everyone...and they are people who are in a relationship that shouldn't really be in one for their own good.
Those who are in a relationships aren't better than those who aren't in one. Not everyone that is in a relationship isn't some weak person that can't be happy without having a boyfriend/girlfriend. Yes, I will agree that they are people out there that are in relationships, or want one because they aren't happy with who they are. Like I said before, I have a boyfriend that I'm very happy with...but it isn't the end all be all. I know that I will be okay without having him next to me 24/7. And if we did break up...I know that I will be okay and that life goes on. Relationships are great, but they aren't everything. If you can't take care of yourself then how do you expect to take care of another person.
I know a couple that is getting married, but they shouldn't because one the guy is trying to prove something and he is only getting what he thinks is the best he can do, and she is marrying him because she doesn't want die alone and she is cheating on him with many guys.
I guess what I'm saying is that relationships aren't everything and that you need to be happy with yourself. But I disagree with the quote because it sounds like everyone that is in a relationship needs people to be happy.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Jealousy is ugly (a public apology)
These past few days; I've realized that I've been super jealous for something that I shouldn't be. Last year during the fall my boyfriend is friend with this one girl and I've been super jealous about their time together because I thought that she was trying to get with him. He told me that there isn't anything going on, but I've been really mean towards him. I've talked to a couple of people who knows him and they tell me that there isn't anything to worry about because he loves me and most of the time he gets real aggravated by her and all the drama that she brings. Also that if she did had a thing for him that it would only last a little while because she has a flavor of the month (meaning that she has so many crushes every other week). But I still was angry with him and I didn't trust him, and it is wrong of me to be like that because he was open about it and didn't lie about it.
I'm sorry to my boyfriend for being upset with you and accusing you for things without hearing out the whole story. If this girl did had a crush on you there wouldn't been anything for you to do...I didn't trust you and it was wrong.
I'm sorry to this girl for accusing you for things that I didn't know much about. I was uncomfortable on how close you were with my boyfriend. But it gave me no right for taking out my insecurities out on you. I should get to know the person you are and not just listen to what people think of you.
You don't have to forgive me, but I want to let you know that I'm truly sorry. It is hard for me to to admit that I was wrong...but I was.
I'm sorry to my boyfriend for being upset with you and accusing you for things without hearing out the whole story. If this girl did had a crush on you there wouldn't been anything for you to do...I didn't trust you and it was wrong.
I'm sorry to this girl for accusing you for things that I didn't know much about. I was uncomfortable on how close you were with my boyfriend. But it gave me no right for taking out my insecurities out on you. I should get to know the person you are and not just listen to what people think of you.
You don't have to forgive me, but I want to let you know that I'm truly sorry. It is hard for me to to admit that I was wrong...but I was.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Making the best of it
So far 2012 haven't been started off on a good start. One of my best friends' cousin's lost their father in law to an accident. Then my boyfriend isn't allowed back to school for a year, and his parents are being...blah... 2012 doesn't seem to be a good year, but it's life and we need to move on. We learn from the bad things that happen and try to make them better.
Example: My boyfriend is going to take that year off to figure his life out. He is trying to find a job and I hope he finds something good! He is taking a few classes at CoC that he needs and save up until he can go back to Humboldt. So I'm going to do my best to support him and help him along the way.
As long as we have each other and a few good friends that it will make things a little easier. I'm sad that things are happening the way they are, but I'm going to try to make things work and so is my boyfriend.
Life is hard and sometimes it throws us hard balls, but it is what we do that will make or break us. No one said it isn't going to easy, but that it will be worth it at the end.
Example: My boyfriend is going to take that year off to figure his life out. He is trying to find a job and I hope he finds something good! He is taking a few classes at CoC that he needs and save up until he can go back to Humboldt. So I'm going to do my best to support him and help him along the way.
As long as we have each other and a few good friends that it will make things a little easier. I'm sad that things are happening the way they are, but I'm going to try to make things work and so is my boyfriend.
Life is hard and sometimes it throws us hard balls, but it is what we do that will make or break us. No one said it isn't going to easy, but that it will be worth it at the end.
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